Empowerment and confidence, I have come to realize is a journey and one that requires that we bring along with us the same three friends that Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz discovered on her journey down the yellow brick road.

I was in a video store the other day and I had a great “aha” moment that inspired me to write this post. While standing in line I saw a large poster of the Wizard of Oz and the four main characters walking arm-in-arm down the yellow brick road.

Who are these three friends? Think for a moment- who where the three characters that Dorothy met one her path that helped her survive and complete her journey to uncovering her own inner power? Yes, it was the lion (needed courage), the tin man (needed a heart) and the scarecrow (needed a brain).

Recall that when she met them, they were (or thought that they were), missing these traits. By the end of her journey, they had them – and Dorothy realizes by the end of the movie, that that which she was searching for, was “here all along”. Here’s the lesson.

As a society, we have been taught in early childhood, (interesting that this is an early childhood favorite movie) that we need to control and repress our feelings and emotions. In fact we often feel ashamed of having “bad” feelings as an adult and we tend to avoid this pain at all costs!

Yet, if we were taught how to manage our feelings without having guilt and shamed heaped upon us in various ways, we could accept feelings without it turning into explosive drama. We could start out earlier in life befriending feelings and emotions and learning how to integrate this part of our psyche in a healthy manner.

If we did, they would not block up our energy flow and build up pain that causes dis-ease and dysfunction. The fact is, most of us have become so fearful (no lion, no courage) of pain, shame and guilt around the stories that our “autobiographical memory” ego storyteller has created early in life, that we cannot even begin to accept the friend of “heart” (tin man) to begin the journey.

We have no courage and we refuse to look at the heart. We tend to travel the road of life only with the scarecrow (brain, intellect) and wonder why we feel incomplete? We often feel that something is missing. Well, it is! We become numb after years of rejecting the other part of ourselves – heart, or feeling nature!

I have come to realize from living a blocked emotional life for so many years, that once I found courage on my journey, that I was able to accept the companion of feelings/heart, along with my brain/intellect.

I was able to escape the illusion that my power was outside of myself (the wizard). My power is within, I am empowered, and it was here all along!

When we learn to stop repressing our feelings and seeing them as “bad” we can heal the old backed up blockages and learn to relearn how to manage our current feelings in reel-time, now. You see, you are no longer an immature 2-year-old so as an adult you will have the resources to feel without throwing a tantrum or having a fit (once you heal the emotional blocks, that is, for some people).

Once I learned that I would not break down if I felt my feelings, I learned how to release and heal the old mental stories and drama, and now, my feelings are flowing better and when consciously managed they flow out without drama within a minute or two and I can move on. As long as you are living in a human body, you will experience feelings and emotions.

The key to empowerment is to uncover the old childhood story that has you stuck (easier to do than you probably realize) and release the cellular memory that the “inner child” is holding onto. Emotional healing is the door to the abundant, whole life.

Understanding the science aspects to this is very helpful. Also, when you start with the understating of everything is energy –thoughts, feelings and emotions included – this process is far, far less intimidating than it has been historically.

I am now enjoying my journey and I bring my friends of courage, intellect and feelings, wherever I go. It is empowering to live integrated; spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically!

Valencia Ray MD

The Confidence Doc